Monday, October 1, 2007

You face not Gutrot, but the legions he commands!

The legends tell of a vision received by the troll witch doctor Sen'jin, of a young orc named Thrall who would arrive to deliver his people from the threat of human and murloc. Indeed Thrall did arrive, and led the Darkspear to a place of greatness in the Horde.

As he lay dying, Sen'jin received yet another vision, of another hero-to-come. Those who received his final prophecy discounted it as fevered hallucination. From out of the ranks of a re-established Darkspear Tribe would come the mightiest (and most mentally imbalanced) warrior ever known to troll-kind, a hero and champion for a new age, to once again deliver the Darkspear from a grave threat: that of clothing. This prophecy, too, was fulfilled, in modern times.


For those not in the know, the legendary troll warrior Gutrot of Aerie Peak (EU) recently completed his journey to hit level 70 by fighting "butt naked and unarmed" for the entire lifetime of the character. Wielding naught but his fists and attired only by his welded-on loincloth, this arduous task took nearly 32 days played and 15 calendar months.

Gutrot has been an inspiration to freethinkers (and deviants) throughout the World of Warcraft. On his own server he leads the guild Naked Noobs, which boasts two level 70 characters (the other being Katolikk, a fire mage) and 84 characters on its roster. And on the Steamwheedle Cartel (US) server, his project was indirectly responsible for the birth of a young melee-only hunter named Gweryc.

I have always admired Gutrot for his ineffable determination, his willingness to do something strange, his valiant efforts to combat boredom, common sense, and fashion sense. When I heard that he was celebrating his final ding with a party at Sen'jin Village, there was no way I could not attend. Using trial accounts created solely for the purpose of paying homage to this hero, both Auden and I were witnesses to one of the most memorable events in WoW history.

The count of attendees was innumerable. The celebratory guild Gutrot Party Crew reached its maximum capacity of 500 in mere moments. Never before have so many naked trolls gathered together in one place. The sheer population density was, in fact, strongly reminiscent of the opening of the gates of Ahn'Qiraj. And the occasion felt no less momentous.

With Zalazane firmly on farm status, from Sen'jin Village to the zeppelins we went, from Grom'gol to Duskwood to Sentinel Hill, where our marauding nudists laid waste to guards and gryphons. We moved from Westfall to Elwynn Forest, through Goldshire and into Stormwind itself. As this tsunami of blue flesh washed over the unexpecting Alliance, the guards literally froze with indecision. There were simply too many of us to respond to. We pressed on, masses rushing toward Tram and Keep until at last Gutrot imparted unto us his gracious farewell.

Congratulations to you, warrior. Your deeds have surely fixed your name among the pantheon of heroes. Sen'jin. Vol'jin. Gutrot.

Now please... wash your loincloth. Seventy levels is long enough.

Excellent photos of the event begin on page 114 of Gutrot's epic thread.


Gutrot said...

Greetings Mon from Gutrot!

So glad you could make it from your parallel Azeroth for our little shindig on Saturday night.

Quite a night was'nt it!

I've checked in on your blog often to see what you're up to and /salute the your leftfield approach to WOW with great respect.

Genius my dwarven friend, genius.

I have a feeling theres a little troll blood in you somewhere...

Drop by again sometime for a chat...I may be able to reply this time when my chat log is not moving at the speed of light with the flurry of a thousand whispers.

Taz'dingo my brother!


Noor/Reinisch, WoW pacifist said...

Mother of mercy, is this the end of Gutrot?

Adding 15 armor to his loincloth!